Evidence-Based Grief Support · Singapore
The Grief Recovery
Method
There are more than 40 types of grief and loss. Whatever yours is, you deserve more than simply learning to cope. The Grief Recovery Method is an internationally recognised, evidence-based programme for completing the emotional pain of loss — not just managing it.
What is GRM?
Moving beyond grief,
not just through it
The Grief Recovery Method (GRM) is an evidence-based programme developed over decades and practised worldwide. It was created on a simple but profound truth: grief is not an illness to be diagnosed or a wound that heals with time alone. It is undelivered communication — feelings left unsaid, relationships left incomplete.
Most well-meaning support asks you to talk about your loss, or to reach a point of "acceptance." GRM does something different. It gives you a structured, guided set of tools to complete the emotional pain — so you can carry your love forward without being held in the grip of grief.
As a Certified Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist, I offer this programme as an extension of our coaching work, available when you feel ready to go deeper.
The Grief Recovery Method helps grievers deal with those things they wish might have been different or better. It gives them the chance to address their dreams and hopes for the future — which is not the future they had planned. It helps them address the words left unspoken. It helps them with the lost relationship that they thought would cause them pain for the rest of their lives.
— Grief Recovery Method
Challenging What You've Been Told
Myths that keep grievers stuck
Most of us grew up hearing well-meaning words that — despite the love behind them — can actually prevent healing. GRM challenges these myths directly.
"You've got to stay strong."
Staying strong often means suppressing your grief — pushing it down rather than moving through it. GRM invites you to be honest about how you truly feel, because that honesty is where healing begins.
"Keep yourself busy."
Busyness can distract, but it cannot complete. Grief deferred does not disappear — it waits. GRM creates space to meet your grief gently, so it no longer needs to be avoided.
"Time will heal."
Time alone does not heal grief. What heals is the action you take within that time. GRM gives you the tools to actively complete the emotional pain — so time becomes part of your healing, not just its measure.
"Grief just takes time."
Many grievers carry their pain for years, decades, a lifetime — and wonder why time has not helped. Grief moves when we engage with it, not simply when we wait.
"Don't feel bad."
Telling someone not to feel bad is asking them to pretend. GRM does the opposite — it honours every feeling, every loss, every layer. Your grief is valid. All of it.
Why GRM?
A different kind of healing
The Grief Recovery Method is not therapy, not counselling, and not a support group. It is a structured, action-based programme that empowers you with tools you can use for every loss in your lifetime.
Action-Based, Not Talk-Based
GRM does not ask you to endlessly process your pain. It gives you specific, guided actions to move through it — completing what was left unsaid or unexpressed.
Tools for a Lifetime
There are more than 40 types of grief and loss. Once you learn these tools, you carry them with you — they work for every loss you will ever face, not only this one.
Internationally Recognised
Developed by The Grief Recovery Institute and practised around the world, GRM has helped hundreds of thousands of people complete their grief across cultures and continents.
Understanding the Difference
Coaching & GRM vs Therapy
Many people come to me having tried therapy, or wondering if coaching is the right fit. Here is how they differ — so you can make the choice that feels right for you.
| Coaching & GRM Approach | Therapy Approach |
|---|---|
| You are seen as whole, complete, and creative — capable of finding your own answers. | Assumes there is something to be diagnosed and treated. |
| Co-partnering — equal power. The coach is not the expert on your life; you are. | The therapist is the expert. The dynamic tends to be more dependent. |
| Focuses on the present and future. Revisiting the past is to help you retrieve the narrative, then move forward. | Often focuses on going back into the past to heal and address unresolved trauma. |
| You are responsible for your learning, healing, and growth. The power is in your hands. | Client may rely on the therapist to gain control over thinking, emotions, and behaviour. |
| Appropriate when you can function and are ready to take action toward your healing. | More suitable if you are deeply traumatised and cannot function day-to-day. |
Note: Coaching and GRM are not a substitute for professional medical or mental health services. If you are in crisis, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional.
The Programme
Seven sessions.
A lifetime of tools.
The GRM programme consists of seven guided sessions, each building on the last. Together, we move through the method with care, at your pace.
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Introduction & Foundation
We explore what grief truly is, and what it is not. Many misconceptions about grief keep people stuck — we clear those first, so you can move forward with honesty and clarity.
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The Language of Grief
We look at the messages you received about grief — from family, culture, religion, and society — and how these have shaped the way you grieve now.
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Recognising What You Carry
We begin to map the full scope of your loss — including the parts that are rarely spoken about. Pregnancy loss, infant loss, and perinatal grief often carry layers that remain unnamed and unexpressed.
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Relationships & Loss
Every loss involves a relationship — with a person, a future, an identity, a dream. We explore the fullness of that relationship honestly, including joy, love, conflict, and complexity.
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Undelivered Communication
This is the heart of GRM. We work with what was left unsaid — the love, the gratitude, the hurt, the apologies. Completing these communications is what allows grief to move.
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The Completion Letter
You write and read a letter — a deeply personal act of completion. Not goodbye. Not forgetting. A full expression of everything that was, and a gentle releasing of what can now be let go.
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Moving Forward with Love
In our final session, we integrate the journey. You now have tools to meet any loss in your lifetime. We close with care, and with clarity about how to continue your healing beyond our work together.
Who GRM Supports
More than 40 types
of grief and loss
GRM was not designed for one kind of loss. It holds space for all of them. Whatever you are carrying, there is a place for it here.
“Every loss you have ever experienced lives in your body. GRM gives you the tools to meet them all.”
Defining Grief
What grief really is
According to the Grief Recovery Method, "Grief is the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a familiar pattern of behaviour."
This definition helps us understand that grief can stem from any significant change — not just from loss through death or separation. Grief arises wherever something familiar has changed or ended, and our inner world has not yet caught up.
Beyond tangible life changes, there are also intangible sources of grief — the loss of trust, approval, safety, and control over one's body. Recognising these less visible forms of grief is crucial for understanding how broadly and deeply grief can affect our lives.
Pregnancy loss, infant loss, and fertility grief carry many of these invisible layers. They may be dismissed by others who cannot see them, but GRM holds all of them.
Intangible losses GRM recognises
- Loss of trust
- Loss of approval
- Loss of safety
- Loss of control over one's body
- Loss of a future you had imagined
- Loss of identity as a parent
- Loss of hope after repeated loss
Vernessa Chuah · Mindful Space
Your Guide
Walking alongside you,
with lived experience
I am Vernessa Chuah — recognised as Southeast Asia's first Pregnancy & Infant Loss Coach, ICF-certified, and a Certified Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist. I have been walking with bereaved parents since 2011.
My journey into this work began with my own losses — three pregnancies, including my daughter Violet. I know what it is to grieve invisibly, to hold a grief that others cannot see or name. And I know what it is to find a path through.
I offer the Grief Recovery Method as an option for those who are ready to go deeper — as a natural extension of our coaching, or as a standalone programme. It is available in-person in Singapore and online globally.
Important to Know
The Grief Recovery Method is not therapy, counselling, or a substitute for professional medical or mental health services. If you are experiencing clinical depression, acute trauma, or crisis, please seek support from a qualified mental health professional.
Your participation in GRM will not qualify you to lead or facilitate Grief Recovery Method sessions, or to become a certified GRM Specialist. Learn more at griefrecoverymethod.com.
All information shared within our sessions is held in strict confidence. Confidentiality is maintained in accordance with ICF ethical standards and will only be broken if required by law or where your safety is at risk.
Begin Your Healing
You deserve more
than just coping
If you are ready to go deeper — to complete the emotional pain of your loss and carry your love forward — I would be honoured to walk this path with you. Reach out and let's begin with a gentle conversation.